


Worth the Effort

by locrianrose



Series: Fire Emblem Fluff Bingo [2]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Character Study, F/M, Fire Emblem Fluff Bingo, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Nudity, Post-Black Eagles Route (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Time Loop, spoilers for all routes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:02:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27830458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/locrianrose/pseuds/locrianrose
Summary: After the war Felix worries about Byleth. He does what he can to help.
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/My Unit | Byleth
Series: Fire Emblem Fluff Bingo [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2024311
Kudos: 28





	Worth the Effort

Felix held Byleth’s hand as he helped her through the secret corridors of the Imperial palace in Enbarr, guiding her to the rooms Edelgard allowed them to use as they’d continued their battles against Those Who Slither in the Dark. They’d gotten back hours before, and Edelgard had finally insisted that they all rest hours into the subsequent meeting after, and Felix suspected she’d done so when Byleth had started to drift off mid meeting.

Felix didn’t like how hard they were pushing her now, especially after how the war had ended. He’d searched for her on the battlefield that day, looking for her among the dead, until Sylvain had found him and told him what had happened.

It had taken her nearly a month to recover physically enough to even attempt anything that she’d been able to do before. Felix had hated that, seeing her bedridden, and he knew she had hated it just as much as he had. When she’d been able to get back on her feet, she’d wanted to train, to fight, but something in Felix had been terrified that he would hurt her now. He had wanted to spar with her as he had any other time, to prove to himself (and to her) that she was everything that she had been before she lost whatever she had before this.

He’d been childish before the war with his challenges to her, telling her that he’d wanted to defeat her. His words now haunted him, especially after the war and knowing that if he hadn’t been convinced by Sylvain that Byleth was the best way to train (and Felix’s own desire for distance from his father and Dimitri), he very well could have went up against her in battle. The loss of his father and Ingrid still haunted him, and he had an sickening feeling that Dimitri’s death would haunt with him time as well.

That could have been Byleth. That could have been Sylvain. That could have been Bernadetta, Dorothea, or Lysithea, or any of the other Black Eagles that he’d come (begrudgingly, in some cases) to care for.

When Byleth had been able start training again, she had refused to let him go easy on her. He knew that she would be able to tell if he did, so he’d managed to convince her to do a week of training that consisted solely of drills. She’d objected, but after the first day she’d been unable to do much, so she’d silently obliged.

She’d grown more expressive over the course of the war, but now, she’d seemed to become quieter again, retreating into herself as she tested her new limits, and like so many things, Felix didn’t like that fact. He didn’t like that she couldn’t seem to speak about what had happened at the end of the war and how she had changed. He didn’t like that it had become easier to defeat her in battle. He didn’t like that he could see her struggle more now, and that despite the fact that they all tried to help her and step in when they could, he didn’t know if he could do enough.

She had gotten better since then, and in a fight she was still a more than capable threat, but he noticed more now. Byleth had quietly spoken to him about her silent heartbeat in a dark moment during the war, and he was well aware of how it beat now. The change in her hair back to her original blue was the most noticeable difference to someone wasn’t as familiar with her as he was, but Felix saw all.

There had been moments during the war where she’d seem to lose track of where she was and who was there with her. They had always passed quickly then, a single incorrect response or a something she’d mutter when she was exhausted after battle that she’d try to hide, but he saw those moments more and more now. They both had nightmares about the war, but he’d heard her say things in her sleep that didn’t add up.

It was cruel, but he didn’t pin Byleth as one who’d call out for someone she’d barely known like Leonie or Lorenz like that. Maybe she would. He could be wrong. Maybe her mind taunted her with things she’d never seen, or maybe she was just hurting, but there were things she’d known about Ingrid that couldn’t be possible. There had been one haunting night when she’d said things about his father that she couldn’t have known , and he hadn’t been able to help her then, holding his own head in his hands while she’d panicked.

Whatever the goddess had done to her to touch her had left her with scars she couldn’t explain that remained even after whatever changes that had happened to her were gone. It was still her, though, and he’d been sure to tell her that when she doubted, that she was still herself and able to do what she needed to do to fight and care for her friends.

Tonight he could see that it was wearing on her as she leaned on him as they walked, even despite all the work she’d put into returning to fighting shape, so he held her hand and silently helped her along. The fight hadn’t been an easy one, and he had seen how she would pause in battle now when something went wrong, looking puzzled for a fraction of a second before continuing on again.

Felix pressed on the door that would open into the hall where the room was, leading Byleth through behind him. She straightened as they went through the door, holding herself up to her full height as they moved the last few steps to be sure that if anyone saw her, anything she might be struggling with would be hidden.

Edelgard had been sure to place Byleth somewhere she’d assured her was safe, and when Byleth had been unwell there had always been someone nearby or keeping watch when Felix couldn’t be there. The room had been dusty when they’d first arrived, hidden away and empty, but Edelgard had made sure that they were both taken care of.

Byleth unlocked the door, slipping in before him. Felix followed her in in after her, carefully locking the door.

Felix glanced quickly over to Byleth, cheeks coloring as he saw that she’d already begun to strip off her armor. Her sword was resting by the side of the bed. Felix removed his and placed it to the side of where he would sleep, carefully resting there. They both slept better with easy access to weapons.

Felix began to strip off his own clothes, starting to unbuckle belts. He slipped off his jerkin before he felt Byleth behind him, wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in her turtleneck, pressing her chest up against him.

“Bathe with me?” She murmured. “I need you.”

Felix felt himself flush again.

“If you let me undress.”

Byleth hummed agreeably, releasing him and wandering away. Felix stripped off his shirt, stealing a glance at Byleth as she plodded to the bathroom, clothes abandoned on the floor.

The imperial plumbing system had to be by far the best thing about living here. While the rest of Fodlan had stagnated under Rhea, the Adrestian Empire had been constantly pressing ahead, and that had led to a system of underground pipes and careful engineering that miraculously enabled public baths and here, in the imperial palace, select rooms with private bathing areas. It was far better than bathing in a river or being forced to wait for buckets of water to be carried up, and Felix felt far less guilty taking that luxury when he wasn’t forcing someone else to do the work for him.

Felix stripped off his remaining clothes, then moved towards the bath and the alcove it was settled in. Byleth had settled into the stone basin, sitting in the filling water that Felix knew would be too hot for him for several minutes.

He sat on the side, watching as the water filled.

“I’m tired of this.” Byleth finally said, speaking quietly. “All of this, over and over.”

Felix felt a sharp pulse of panic as Byleth spoke, shoving it down before he spoke.

“What can I do to help?” Direct was a good place to start. Direct was what Felix understood, and what he knew how to to help, and he knew that while it wasn’t always the right answer by now, it was still the place to begin.

“I’ve seen too many friends die. ”

Hot water be damned, Felix was going in. He turned off the water, then winced as he swung his legs over the edge, cursing as he lowered himself down to sit facing Byleth.

“What about Edelgard?” Felix said. “What about Linhardt? Bernadetta?”

Byleth stared at her hands, then slowly placed them on the scar over the heart that now beat.

“Do you think that this’ll be the last time?”

Felix reached out to grasp her shoulders tightly, desperately unsure as to what to say.

“By, I don’t know how to help. I don’t know what you mean.”

Byleth looked up to Felix, gaze absent.

“This feels like it’s the last time. I’m glad that you followed me here too. I didn’t want to take you away from your friends, but you came anyways.” Byleth raised a hand to brush it against Felix’s cheek.

“Byleth, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Felix shifted closer in the water, pulling her close to him. “I need you to—” He broke off, trying to find the right words. “—to know that you’re here with me now.”

Byleth let him hold her there, and Felix was relieved when she embraced him back after a long, terrifying moment.

“Can you tell me what you mean?” He asked her, holding her tightly in the now bearable water.

“There were five lives.” Byleth whispered. “First, hers. Then mine, then again, again, and then now.”

Felix wracked his brain, terrified at what Byleth’s words might mean, trying to piece together what she was trying to say. She’d always been different, special, and something that none of them had been able to pinpoint at first, but that had changed with time, until— until Kronya, and Solon and the physical change.

This wasn’t easy for him, but for her, he would try anything. He began to card his fingers through her hair, pulling through the snarls that had formed during the day. Felix exhaled, then spoke, reluctant.

“Who came first?” Felix asked.

“Sothis.” Byleth whispered, and Felix felt her shake against him.

That was a name he knew, that they all knew. Felix’s mind was racing, running through all of the details of a religion he’d never been attached to— that he had helped to tear down and reshape along with the rest of the Black Eagles.

He trusted Byleth completely. She’d saved him, all of them, in battles more times that he could count, and he loved her.

Felix flashed back to a conversation with Sylvain and Caspar during the war, discussing how Byleth had always managed to anticipate everything in battle, always there, always prepared for whatever might happen no matter how unexpected. Hubert had been there, looming and listening, with nothing to offer. They hadn’t been able to come to a conclusion as to why. Caspar was incredulous, Sylvain was of no help, and Felix had simply defended her strength and skill.

Hubert had only offered one thing to their conversation— that it almost seemed as if Byleth had known what would happen before it did.

Felix had scoffed at that then, but with what Byleth was saying now—

“When you changed. Because of Solon and Kronya— you left, and came back different.”

“I remember things that I never saw.”

“But you’re—you’re not how you were before now.”

Byleth shuddered. “I don’t think I get another chance to get it right.”

“You’re here with me now.” Felix said. This would explain the things she’d said, other moments that she hadn’t been present.

“I know.”

“Focusing on the past and what could have been is only going to make it worse.” Felix started, then hesitated. “But—if you need to talk about it— you can.”

Byleth reached up, pulling the tie out of Felix’s hair with a sniff, slowly unpinning the rest of it.

“I’m glad you’re here.” She said quietly, pulling away to set the tie and hairpins to the side. “Thank you.”

Felix could see that she was crying now, but before he could think of what to do, Byleth slid down into the basin on her back, letting the water flow over her face. Her legs parted on either side of Felix where he sat, and he took her in as she held her breath under the water, from the way her hair floated under the surface to the lump of scar tissue that traveled down between her breasts then down to the private places that they’d shared when they’d taken time to explore each other fully.

Byleth splashed up from under the surface of the water, propping herself up on her elbows as she did, face clearer.

“Thank you.” She hesitated, and Felix waited. “I can explain if you need.”

“You can tell me what you need to.” Felix said, then continued with the words that were hard to say. “I trust you.”

“I love you.” Byleth whispered.

Felix had found that it was different, caring about someone like this. It was different finding someone who it was worth pushing himself for, and someone who had given him a reason to keep pushing forward and more than one reason to be stronger. It was hard to expose parts of himself that he didn’t like sharing.

The more he tried, the more it was worth it. Waking up in the morning with Byleth curled against him was an experience that he never could have anticipated. The late night sparring sessions in an empty training yard were more than enjoyable, and the more intimate direction they often took after was a new personal favorite of his.

Byleth was worth the effort.

“I love you.” Felix replied, knowing well that the same accursed blush that always plagued him around Byleth would be coloring his cheeks. Byleth gave him a small smile from where she lay in the water. Felix shifted in the water, moving to rest on his side, with his head on Byleth’s chest. “I’m here for you.”

**Author's Note:**

> reminder that i'm still accepting requests for fire emblem fluff bingo over on tumblr @ neotula! taking requests for stuff mainly from Fates, Awakening, Three Houses, Geology of the Holy War, or Sacred Stones. (although stuff from the last two might take me more time to write, as I'm not the most secure in my ability to write the characters from those games yet, but i will give it a shot!). I have the bingo card pinned on my blog, and i'm only taking requests from it currently so if there's a slot that hasn't been filled, feel free to ask!


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